Thank you Yael.

When I first got sober a couple of years ago, I was raw, vulnerable, and there are always people looking for that, to take advantage.

The men, two of them, it turned out, came in from out of town, having somehow heard about me. When I was finally able to get rid of them they never came back.

The women are still in town, and I still see them, one in particular, from time to time.

That 'particular' woman was the one I was really attracted to, from the first time I saw her.

Women come at me differently than men, seeming to offer a relationship rather than just sex. She was no different.

She is the one that I did not have sex with. I quickly began to develop real feelings for her. I couldn’t just do a hookup with her. It didn’t feel right.

Those feelings remain, but are tamped down. I only bring them out occasionally, like now.

We sometimes see each other at AA meetings. Our eyes seek each other. Then we merely give a small smile and a nod.

She went on to be with a man, a large, alpha type, who I won’t go on to describe, because I would not be charitable.

I don’t know of any obvious evidence, but I just get the feeling that she’s afraid of him, the classic hostage situation.

I’ve seen a lot of fear in her from the beginning, a quiet desperation, a deep need to be protected, cared for.

I suppose that my gut has told me all along that she’s a very codependent sort. I think that was why I didn’t get involved with her.

It simply felt like instinct, intuition perhaps.

Sorry. I need some sleep.

Peace Love Kindness Respect the more you give the more you get 😍 start with yourself 😉 because you deserve it ❤️🙏🏼

--weezi--💖🙏🏼💜🙏🏼🦄🥰

PS: At 62, I am now able to resist sweeping damsels off their feet, but the desire to do so remains…you seem to be feeling very vulnerable these days. I really hope that you’re doing alright.

Take care of yourself bb.-weezi+💜🙏🥰