People who are insecure and therefore defensive are hypervigilant as regards any word or action of another person that could, in any way, indicate that they are "weak" or needing help.
These people live their lives under a cloud of unworthiness, believing that they are weak or stupid, possibly 'not man enough' or 'not woman enough'.
They are very frightened of other people finding out how "inferior" they are.
This causes them to be hysterically sensitive to anything that could remotely be considered disparaging of their agency, masculinity/femininity, power and/or confidence.
They go through every day, constantly on edge, feeling like a fraud, an actor, pretending to be "normal".
This can be in relation to "proper" masculinity, competency, intelligence, creativity, etc, whatever they feel like is lacking in themselves.
They are so frightened of being "found out" that their reaction to any percieved slight is explosive and unusually extreme.
Often they lash out defensively, and then immediately regret it, first because it screams out the sad state of their self-esteem, and possibly because they know that the person they exploded at didn't deserve it.
That only serves to further confirm, in their minds, their weakness, inferiority.
It's a vicious cycle...
Thanks.
--weezi--💜🌈🙏🏼🌻🥳

PS; well that was disproportionately lengthy! I just woke up and am finishing my first cup of coffee 😂